"Extreme Contesting"

After a short hiatus, Just What you Expected has returned...I can't guarantee a new blog entry every day, nor can I even guarantee a new entry every week, but the people have spoken - they want just what they expected. As the great Bruce Dickinson would say (when not piloting a plane for Icelandair): "I need more cowbell!" In an effort to produce more content, I'll try to be a little less picky in my blog subjects, and a bit more efficient while wearing both my "writer's" hat and my "editor's" hat.

This weekend, while I was down in NYC drinking, eating, and sweating in celebration of a certain college friend's bachelor party, my parents were at a summer bbq outing at the Hampton Yacht Club near Hampton Beach, NH (those familiar with Hampton, my mother said it had a "fantastic view" of the Seabrook, NH nuclear power plant...which is nice). When questioned as to what this bbq was in connection with, my mother matter-of-factly answered "It was for your father's little contest club." I figured this would be a great opportunity to enlighten my readers about this fascinating sub-culture known as the "contest winners club," and I would go as far to say that my comments and thoughts are only the beginning of what could be a tremendous study of such a strange group of people.

In an attempt to keep this entry relatively short, I'll provide a few things about the "Contest Club" to allow you to get a better impression:

-The club meets every summer for a "summer outing," and apparently there is a "convention" held annually in which all the local chapters of the club congregate in one spot to profess their love of entering contests.

-When asked what the club discusses during said meetings, my mother stated "they usually just stand up and tell everyone which contests they entered and what they won since the last meeting." How this is entertaining to anyone, I'm still not sure. I would imagine there is a significant amount of clapping during this stage of the meeting.

-The club consists mostly of middle age housewives...and my father. Though my mother did state that 4 men in total were at this particular outing, she could not confirm the sexual orientation of the other men. She did, however, note that she was in fact the "only non-member to attend the meeting." Apparently, the husbands of these members have other engagements during these meetings. Can you see my "shocked" face?

-As one would guess, I believe there are also contests which take place during the meeting, but I could not confirm this. I also could not confirm cost of the meeting and/or membership in this "elite" club....mainly because my mother was on her lunch break, and I wanted to get this blog entry out sooner rather than later. This isn't the New York Times, folks...

Don't get me wrong, my father has been extremely successful in his contest winning - we're talking about trips to Disney World, $500 gas cards, Red Sox tickets/jerseys, even a Harley Davidson Fatboy motorcycle, complete with flames on the side (I wish I had access to the picture of my dad on the hog, but the one I found will have to do...I picked this partially due to my love of mullets and jorts, and partially due to the strange manner in which each person touches the bike with only their thumb). But should he be embarrassed about this hobby (read: addiction)? In my eyes: absolutely.

This is not just a hobby to the man, it's a life pursuit. The mere announcement of a contest gets my father excited, to the point where he has even recruited my grandmother to create "contest envelopes" using old pieces of wallpaper. Apparently, the flashier the envelope, the better chance that it gets picked; that is, only if the winner is selected by hand. If it's some automated selection process...well, I can't express the sadness expressed by my father in words. I'll just use the phrase "emotional exhaustion." I even believe there are magazines, podcasts, and newsletters in connection with entering contests in order to discuss various strategies/contests/crazy people who have won said contests.

If I were to even try to relate this contest club endeavor to something, I guess it would be similar to that of "Extreme Couponing," whereby crazy people attempt to save hundreds of dollars by cutting out and utilizing every possible coupon they come across, to the point where it may in fact affect their normal lives in some manner.

As I've stated, I believe I've only hit the surface of this fascinating "hobby." I sincerely hope that someone has more free time to explore the subject in more depth than I can offer. A case study of my old man would be a nice start. With my father's upcoming retirement, I can only expect his participation in contests to increase tenfold.

* Full disclosure: I have never watched Extreme Couponing, though I do not question the validity of my particular word choice of "crazy" to define this group of people.