The Island: Episode One

After a long awaited hiatus, one of my favorite shows has recently come back to waste more of my time: The MTV Real World/Road Rules Challenge. Just as I did last season, I'd like to utilize this blog once a week for my recap of each episode. Truthfully, its less of a recap and more of a commentary, or an inner monologue. If you haven't actually watched each episode, you probably won't have a clue what I'm talking about.

As I'm well aware, this is probably one of the least popular types of blog entries for the majority of my readers, especially considering I am one of about twelve people in our age bracket who actually watch this show (in all of America, according to the Nielsen ratings,) but I'm willing to take the heat because I enjoy doing this way too much.

As it goes, here's a quick setup of this season's show: There are 20 different former RW/RR cast members, and they are all brought out to this deserted island somewhere off the coast of Panama on BMX by their host, TJ Lavin. By BMX, I mean motor boat. Anyways, this year's setup is much more like Survivor and less like The Gauntlet or The Inferno - the premise is to build 2 boats, with only 4 people per boat, with a few people getting keys to this treasure chest in which you need to open on some other isla.....actually, that's enough of a show summary - if you don't watch it, nothing I say here will actually cause you to begin watching the show.

On to my comments on the episode:

-Tonya is now living in Nebraska? What the hell is Tonya doing in Nebraska? I'd love to find this one out. I mean, how does someone go from "acting" in a Skinemax soft core porn series (yes, that's right: "The Erotic Traveler") to living in NEBRASKA??

-Exactly how many pounds do you think Ashli gained since we last saw her becoming a homewrecker on RW Australia? Can we set the over/under at 25 pounds? She was doing some work on that rice too. Let's try to hold back on the carbs there, Ashli.

-Who the hell is Dan?

-Love the fact that Kelly Anne went straight from projectile vomiting to smiling as if she just won her first Oscar.

-Abram is absolutely out of his mind....and I love every minute of it.

-I can't get over the fact that Derrick got married, and has a kid on the way. First of all, I would LOVE to see Derek's wife, and secondly, let's read that sentence over again - Derrick has a KID on the way. He sure seems ready for a kid, especially with his past history of drug addiction, alcohol addiction, and did I mention uncontrollable fits of rage, crying, and/or aggression?

-By Jenn's comments, are we to assume that she hooked up with Rachel?? I feel like this was somewhat implied. If so, where's my footage? Come on, guys - this is MTV we are talking about.

On a side note, it hurts to say this, but I think I nominate Jenn as most improved in terms of hotness. This is not saying she is hot - it merely notes that she is more attractive than when we last saw her. Johanna still rates as # 1 in my book.

-Where exactly is TJ coming from? Do you think he lives on the island as well? Possibly in a suite, complete with A/C, television, running water/showers, etc.? Or is he living in the same awful conditions as the competitors?

-These air drops from the Army better not only bring food and pieces of the boat to the cast members. If so, its gonna be a LONG season. Let's hope that MTV hasn't forgotten the one key ingredient which keeps this show moving - ALCOHOL. I realize the 1st episode featured some booze, but something tells me that this stuff won't be rationed nearly as well as the rice and chicken. Without alcohol, there will be no hookups, no fights, no anything - the show would essentially be a bunch of superficial, pretentious idiots just sitting around waiting for an elimination challenge. Please tell me this is not the case, MTV.

In summation - good initial episode, and hoping for a stellar season all around.